Tuesday, December 29, 2009

The Eternal Post-Holiday Season Question...

How long do you think I can keep my Christmas tree up before it becomes a real fire hazard?

I just love it, it's so cute and short and it keeps my apartment smelling less like cat litter, which is always a good thing.

But eventually it's going to be a little weird.

But seriously, look how pretty:

Monday, December 28, 2009

Best. Present. Ever.

My brother is the greatest brother on the face of the planet.

He bought me a video camera for Christmas.

The only thing that could have made this a more touching experience is if I'd opened all my presents and was lounging on the couch staring at all the crumpled wrapping paper on the floor, and all of a sudden Sean leans forward and says, "Say, what's that behind the desk?" and I go over and pull out a long, finely wrapped package with a bow, and open it up to discover that it's a digital camcorder. With a compass in the stock. And this thing that tells time.

Still, it was pretty awesome.

Therefore, more funny videos are pending. Stay tuned.

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Fail/Success. At the same time. Weird.

Okay so I didn't get the part, but I got some of the best feedback I've ever gotten from an audition outside of college.

It was really surprising. I figured the only reason I'd even get a call would be if I got the role, and if I didn't I would just never hear from them again. They would go to that imaginary island where I send all the directors and casting directors that have never called me again. In that environment I imagine them battling for clean water and flounder while trying to stage a revival of "Song and Dance," all the while wishing they had a sassy twenty-something brunette with a kick-ass British dialect to play Emma.

But imagine my surprise when I checked my phone on my break on Saturday and I had a voicemail.

The voicemail (which I have listened to seven times and now have committed to memory) is from the director, Laura. She explains that they've decided to go in a different direction with Ophelia, the character for which I was auditioning. But THEN, she says:

But Michele, you are such a smart and talented actor. Rarely have I seen such smart, unique, inventive choices being made.
Woot.

So I can't count this one as a fail. It was a really nice kick in the Self-Worth. 2010 is going to be a good year I think.

Now I just need a new camera.

Saturday, December 19, 2009

Audition Log 12/18/09

Audition: Getting Even With Shakespeare, a one-act play as part of the WinterFest 2010 festival.
Champions Studios

Note for the future: If there is a Non-Union open call from 6-9:30 ever again, DO NOT arrive anytime after 6pm. It's not like a party, you're not going to look like a douche if you're the first one there.

I saw "Avatar" that night, which is the source of my tardiness, but still if I'd hauled ass from Lincoln Center as soon as I got out of the movie, I could have gotten a decent slot. As it was I got there around 6:30 and all the slots were full, as well as a list full of write-in slots that went well beyond 9:30. Hopping on the bandwagon, I signed up for 10:45pm.

So now I was stuck with a dilemma, the Should I Stay or Should I Go question.

Normally, I feel like I would have just shrugged my shoulders and went home, accepting the fact that I got there too late and they wouldn't be able to see me. But I'd just seen Avatar in 3D, and spent a good three minutes in the middle of the movie crying because I wasn't IN that movie. Seriously.

So I was in the mood to audition for something.

I made a brief Starbucks run, grabbed a corn dog from Papaya dog, and I decided to hang out. If someone didn't show up, if people decided not to stay, you had best believe I was going to slip my ass in there.

As it turns out, the people running auditions were incredibly generous with their time. There was no one coming into the studio after them, so they said they would stay until closing, which was at 11pm. They bumped a few people to this morning, but they said they'd see as many people as possible.

I stuck around, played around with my phone and doodled in my notebook. The studio across the hall from auditions were having some kind of dance battle for inner-city teenagers. Awesome. It was like a clown car the way lines of kids in big puffy Northface jackets just kept piling in that room, and every time the door opened the hallway filled with thumping bass and the sound of "Hey! Ho!"

There were these three sassy black ladies in charge who sat in the hallway, and every time some kid would come out of the room, they'd grab him by the arm, lead him down the hall saying, "Keep it moving, these people are auditioning!"

Now, having attended Benjamin Cardozo High School, I happen to know that having that many teenagers packed into one room dancing to hip hop music was a bad idea, and it was only a matter of time before something happened, which in a crowded hallway like that in Champions Studios, would no doubt erupt into a stampede like at that America's Next Top Model call when someone yelled, "bomb."

Thankfully, it wasn't until about a quarter to ten, when most of the people waiting to audition had gone home and there were only a handful of us still sitting in the hall. A parade of kids came up to the door to join the dance party, and then all of a sudden, someone's up in someone's grill and before you know it:

Gang Warfare.

Well, it was actually like Little Miss Gang Warfare, because the fight was between two twelve year olds.

The sassy black ladies were very quick in using force to drive the rowdy teenagers out of the hallway, but I do feel bad for the girl whose monologue was interrupted by a chorus of, "Say it to mah face! Say it to mah face!" coming from the outer hallways.

Their tactic was brilliant too. They all had those bathroom air fresheners, like Lysol, and they just started spraying the girls with them. First in the torso, but when they wouldn't back off, they went for the eyes.

It was hilarious.

Needless to say, that was the end of the dance party.

I was one of the last people to audition. There were only two girls after me, one of whom had a Saturday morning slot, and was just hanging around on the off-chance they'd be able to fit her in. I'm sure they got her in right after me, because as I'd predicted, not everyone stuck around.

My monologues seemed to go well. They laughed, which after five straight hours of monologues, is surprising. For my Shakespeare monologue I decided to do Hamlet's "To be or not to be," but as one of those girls on "My Super Sweet Sixteen." I figured if anything else, it would be memorable.

And I was right, because they just called me an hour ago to call me back for one of the roles today at 1:30.

Sweet.

Thursday, December 17, 2009

Tomatoes...

I am sitting in my apartment, drinking white wine and submitting my resume electronically to virtually anything that lists "Caucasian Female, 20-35" in the character breakdown.

Due to my spectacular falling down during the Christmas bar crawl I went on with my co-workers, the viewscreen on my camera has cracked! I can still take pictures, I just don't see what they look like until I upload them onto my computer. It's weird, it's like I've gone back in time to a day in which you got an envelope from CVS full of photos and you're like, "What the hell is this?" Old school.

But that means no videos for a while, which is a real shame. I had a few more rattling around in my brain, I was just procrastinating. Just goes to show you.

I do have $400 in my "Moving to LA" fund, which I've placed in a sealed envelope in hopes that I won't have to dip into it in the Christmas hustle and bustle. Maybe I'll buy myself one of them video cameras with the amusing commercials.

That burger song: Hilarious.

Audition tomorrow, immediately following "Avatar" in IMAX.

It had better be good, because if I go to this movie, and it doesn't stand up to the hype, and then I go to this audition and blow, I'm going to blame James Cameron. James Cameron will owe me.

Monday, November 30, 2009

I've been saving money to move to L.A. since August and I only have $168.

Fuck.

Thursday, November 26, 2009

Tick Tock...

Happy Turkey Day everyone, as I prepare for a long night at work, watching happy people enjoy a $200 turkey dinner with friends and family.

It's all good, I'm having leftovers with my family tomorrow night. I actually kind of like working holidays. And not just because I get time and a half, but because it's kind of nice being with my co-workers on a day like today. All of us are missing a holiday with family, it gives us a nice "Goodnight Saigon" kind of feeling. We're all in it together.

I can't believe it's already the end of November. Mostly because I've only had to break out the winter coat once. Congratulations Al Gore, you were right.

I have yet to peek into my travel fund for after my 25th birthday. It's looking kind of full, but it's mostly small bills. Maybe people will be feeling generous tonight and tip the poor sad girl whose family is eating yams without her. I figure I should have at least 1200 dollars for the move to LA, provided I can find someplace to stay that won't require "rent" in the strictest sense.

Of course if I become famous before then, rather than go to LA I'm going to Europe. And I feel I've taken a step in the right direction. I just got myself a manager.

That management company that had contacted me over the summer, A Future Star Talent, is now AFST Management, and run by a woman named Jenn who is actually good about returning emails and calls, unlike whoever was working there when they cancelled my audition and never rescheduled.

I got a newsletter from them, so I guess I'm still on some kind of mailing list or something, so I emailed them to explain my situation. The next day I got an email with an audition appointment. Way to go Jenn.

She had me read a scene, first with no direction, and then as a ditsy blonde. Then she had me do my Irish accent, and poof: Management. They're a freelance company, so I didn't have to sign anything. It's good but it's also a little worrisome. It's good because I can still look for my own jobs and submit myself for things independently from them. But it makes me a little worrisome because it's a little hard to tell how hard they're going to be fighting for me. I don't know, no contract kind of makes me think there's no obligation, and I'm undecided as to whether or not that's a good thing.

But one thing is for sure, having a manager definitely gives me a leg up. First of all they have more contacts than I do. They have clients who have booked HBO pilots and roles on Ugly Betty and so on. And also it looks a lot better to have a manager submit my resume than if I just found a casting director's address and slapped a stamp on the back of my headshot. Having representation implies that someone has seen you work and thinks that you have talent. It implies that someone believes in you. And that's great.

I'm still going to be trying to get my own stuff. I've only been Jenn's client for less than two weeks and there's only so much she can tell about me from one reading. Probably the best thing I can do is make sure she sees me work so she can get a better sense of who I am. That way she'll know what to submit me for.

She seems really on top of things and professional, I'm really excited about working with her. So much so that I will excuse her spelling her name "JENN" when clearly only one "N" is necessary.

Sunday, October 25, 2009

ActorFest 2009!

Last year I spent $40 bucks on a ticket to ActorFest, having registered too late to get a good deal on any workshops, worked until mindight the night before, woke up too tired to get up, and therefore decided to blow off ActorFest 2008.

Oh but that was in the past, when I thought that I could just waltz around town going to one audition every three weeks, and some casting director would inevitably take me under his wing and coach me into the next Patti LuPone.

THIS year however, I spent the day before ActorFest in Long Island seeing my good friend Evan as Franz in "The Producers" at Theatre Three in Port Jefferson. The train home got me into Penn Station at 2am, which got me home to Queens at 3:30am. I spent some time printing and cutting my resumes, and making sure I had absolutely everything I needed before getting dressed in the outfit I planned to wear to ActorFest, and going to sleep at about 4:45am.

When my alarm went off at 7:30am, I was up. Because this year I'd spent $92, and I had three workshops waiting for me at the Hammerstein Ballroom.

Got there at 9, which is when it technically started. My first class wasn't until 10am, so I figured I'd have a little time just in case there was a line to get in.

Holy Hell, was there a line. It stretched from the entrance on 34th between 8th and 9th, halfway down 34th street, all the way down 8th avenue and halfway down 35th Street as well. Thankfully I ran into a couple of current students at my college, so at least I had someone to stand with.

At 9:45am people started to come down the line pulling out the people who had 10am classes. That was really cool of them. I mean, it was my fault for not anticipating how many people would be there, they could have easily just let us miss our classes. Kudos. And I don't care how many people want to complain about it being disorganized, there must have been a thousand people on line outside at 9:45, let alone the people who were already inside. You try organizing that many people anywhere outside of Nazi Germany.

My first class was a voiceover workshop. Voiceover has just recently occured to me as a career path. There's good money there, and I enjoy doing voices, so I figured I might as well learn some more about it. There was a great panel, including Valerie Smaldone, who is the woman who makes the, "This is Seth McFarlane's third nomination and first win for 'Family Guy'" announcements at the Emmys.

Kind of make me not want to do voiceover anymore. Like most areas of acting, it's not something you do just on a whim. If you're not 100% dedicated to making it as a voiceover artist, then you shouldn't bother. Because apparently it's really competetive. And there's not much of a market for animation in New York. It's mostly L.A. for the kind of voice stuff I would want to do.

Oh well. Informative, to say the least.

Next up was, "The Casting Director's Master Class: On Screen with Todd Thaler." Todd Thaler is a casting director for film and tv. He was one of the only casting directors who came to the showcase my graduating class put on at the end of our senior year. First moment he came in he sat down on the back of his chair with his feat on the seat adorable.

I got the last seat in the first row. Feeling pretty good about, it. I wanted to sit in the front so that i could hear and see everything and be easily heard and seen. And then some Too Cool For School guy in a leather jacket takes a chair from the wall and plops in down right in front of me. I was PISSED. I was like, "Who the hell is this asshole? You can't just make your own row!" Who the hell does this guy think he is? And then he turned his head, and he was Jim Caviezel.

Oh...

Um... carry on.

An interesting thing about Todd Thaler: He's more interested in the person than the actor. Apparently he cast "The Professional" by hvaing conversations with the actors auditioning, and sending tapes to the director. None of them actually did any monologues. Luc Besson got the tapes and cast the actors based on the kind of behavior they showed in the interviews. He said that the ones who got cast were the ones who were the most themselves, and the least self-conscious about being on camera.

He picked some names out of a hat and had the people do a few lines of a monologue. I got picked, which was awesome. Didn't get tooo much feedback, but it was still fun!

After that I had two hour to walk around the ballroom, which was full of booths and tables with classes and headshot photogoraphers. Nearly everyone was offering some kind of deal and holding a raffle for something free. I met some teachers and put my name on some mailing lists and met up with a few more people that I knew.

The amount of people there was insane:


I got a ton of free stuff, most of which I haven't even looked through yet. It's all in my complimentary ActorFest tote bag on my kitchen table.

My last workshop was a cold-reading workshop, which was the closest I came to taking an actual acting class while I was there. The panel was made up of five top acting teachers, and they did the same, name-out-of-a-hat thing and had people do scenes and monologues. This time I didn't get picked, but I learned quite a lot from the feedback they were giving.

Got out around 5:30 and started to crash, since I'd gotten so little sleep and really hadn't eaten since breakfast. Stopped briefly to drop whatever headshots I had left in some of the casting director drop-boxes, and then I headed home, my head full of knowledge and my heart full of joy.

Fell asleep watching The Office at around 7:30 and I didn't wake up until noon.

Good day.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

It's the black lung, Pa...

I emerge from two days of the flu.

The good news: Not Swine Flu.

I think.

Well, I'm all better now. I think my illness was mostly because of my ridiculous schedule the past few weeks. Between "Slice of Life," work at the restaurant, and to top it all off, trying to negotiate a new part time job for some extra money, I think my body pulled a Roger Murtaugh and decided it was too old for this shit.

But I'm all better now, which it good because I have things to do and people to see.

Things to do: ActorFest on Saturday. Badge still hasn't arrived in the mail, but I have my email confirmation, so I'm not too worried.

People to see: Myself in the art exhibit in Brooklyn. It's only running till the end of the week, so I better put some stank on it.

Hope they let me take a picture. In case they don't though, I found this totally bitchin' photo online. Check it out:

Sweet.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Inventory:

Okay, good things about life include the following:

"Slice of Life" is going great. Yesterday's road trip to Jersey was fun, if you don't count the three hours it took us to get there after getting lost three times, and the massive traffic on the way back. But there were Nathan's cheesy fries and a surprising mix CD made by our driver/Director of Photography Lucas.

After we got back to NY they filmed the scene where the pizza boy sees my film poster on the wall, and Partick sent me a picture of it:

I'm kind of really glad I wasn't there while they were shooting it. I saw the poster when Louis first picked it up.

My face is huge. You can kind of see how huge it is because Lucas is standing next to it. It's huge. I can't deal with my face being that huge.

Seriously, it freaks me out a little bit to see my face lying around. When I give out my business cards, if the person doesn't put them away right away, I have to ask them to turn it over.

There's just something very unsettling to me about looking down and seeing my face just lying on a table or something.

Guh.

Something else good, (and oddly enough, having to do with my face lying around): The art exhibit that my headshot is in is currently running in Brooklyn. I'm going to try to get down to see it sometime in the next week. I'll definitely blog about it, so keep the eyes peeled.

Good thing number three: ActorFest is in ten days! One of my workshops got cancelled, which kind of sucks, but it opened up a slot so that I could register for another workshop instead. I decided to take the voice-over workshop, since I've been becoming more interested in voice-overs lately. Mostly because I've been watching a lot of Family Guy.

Feeling pretty good, despite having no money. Lost a few shifts this week due to filming, I'm going to have to do some doubles this weekend to make up for it. I'm game, though. Gotta eat.

Good thing about working in a restuarant though, they have to feed me. Free food.

And now, on to dishes and laundry and all the mundane household things I haven't been able to do in the past few days becuase I've been so busy I haven't even had time to watch all the TV I DVRed.

Sunday, October 11, 2009

How goes the filming...

The hours are long, the pay is non-existent and the activity is repetitive, but man, it's totally worth it.

I've been filming "Slice of Life" this week, at this absolutely gorgeous loft in SoHo. It's been so much fun!

One of my Alpha Psi Omega brothers (theatre honor society-fraternity type thingy) came to stay over last night and got me to thinking about college. New Paltz was a really fun time and I miss it some times, but ultimately I'm glad that I'm out and working. But it's been kind of a rough two years.

The first thing I did out of college was a student-produced production at Queens College. It was being done by some friends of mine, and I stepped in as sort of a favor because one of the students involved got sick and they had no understudy. Success.

I did the reading of "Cherry Smoke" with the Clockwork Theatre, at an Off-Broadway theatre, and helped to develop a new play, which was then produced Off-Broadway the next year. Success.

I was not cast in the actual production. Fail.

I got into "Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat" but shortly thereafter quit because the headache wasn't worth the payoff. Fail.

I got into "Danny and the Deep Blue Sea" but quit for some of the same reasons. Fail.

So after all that, I was a little worried that maybe I didn't have the drive. Maybe if I didn't love the art more than I hated the work, I wasn't really meant to do this for the rest of my life.

But this film has really convinced me that this is what I want to do. I mean, it's just a thesis film for the New York Film Academy, but it's a higher level class and has a bigger budget than the other films I've done with NYFA. The crew is made up of fun people and I'm having an absolutely wonderful time. Even though I was there for the past few days from 9:30 am (and up at 6am) until 7pm (home at 8) and I was running basically on coffee and enthusiasm, I loved every single second of it.

I can't wait to see it all done. That's the great thing about doing a student film. They have to hand it in, so you know it has to be done by a certain time. I think Louis has to hand it in in December, so I'll have it by next year.

I think I only need one more short film to have a pretty decent reel. Huzzah.

But this is also making me feel like film is the right genre for me, which makes the move to LA all the more iminent. Scary.

I have two more scenes to film before I'm done. Tomorrow we're filming at a nursing home in New Jersey. Field trip!

Saturday, October 3, 2009

Question:

I'm 99% sure I'm coming down with a cold and I'm working a double tomorrow.

Is having a glass of wine before bed a good idea or a bad idea?

I've also taken a Zicam.

I'm either about to have an intense reaction or sleep through all of Sunday.

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Audition Log: 10/1/09

Even though I got home from work at 1:30am last night, I dragged my ass out of bed at 6 in the morning to go to the Equity Chorus Call for "Catch Me if You Can"

And was typed-out

But I went. And THAT, my friends, is the point.

Next Audition:
The Princess and the Frog
Tomorrow at 10am

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Fail.

This morning was the Equity Principal Audition for "Catch Me if You Can," a new musical based on the film starring Tom Hanks and Leonardo DiCaprio.

I was really happy that my jury duty was only yesterday, because the EPAs are spanning Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday and I'm going to have a rehearsal for "Slice of Life" tomorrow. So today was the only day I could have gone on the audition. My friend Jocelyn told me about the audition because she thought I would be really great for the role of the nurse, which Amy Adams played in the movie. I agreed, and I was really excited about the audition.

I went to bed at 9:30 last night. I fell asleep watching "Family Guy," and when my alarm went off this morning at 6am, it wasn't a struggle to get out of bed at all.

But I was sitting there on the edge of my bed, thinking about going to this audition, and I just couldn't do it.

I just started thinking about all the EPAs and Equity Chorus Calls I've been to, and how I never get seen, and I was so far behind. I spent the last two years out of college slacking off, and if I'd actually worked hard, I could BE equity by now.

But rather than put a fire under my ass and get me out of bed, in a dress and off to the audition, this thought made me feel completely hopeless. Like there was absolutely no point in my going to this audition because there was no shot at my being seen. And even if I did get seen, the minute they flipped my resume over and saw the number of roles with "SUNY New Paltz" listed next to them, they wouldn't even pay attention to me.

That is assuming I actually started on the right note for my song, breathed correctly or stayed focused on my objective throughout the entire minute and a half.

I did not go.

I folded inward into the Ball of Suck that I am.

And later I totally regretted it, obviously. Because you can't judge an audition before you actually go. I am a complete moron for letting my insecurities win, and I thought for a long time about just pretending it never happened. I wasn't going to post about it or anything.

But then I realized I have to post about it.

It might not seem like a big deal to skip out on one audition, but it is. The more I just skip out and think, "Meh, it's just one audition, I probably wasn't going to get it anyway," the more time I am wasting. This Michele, is what you have been doing for the past two years, and you know what, IT DIDN'T REALLY WORK FOR YOU.

The "Catch Me if You Can" Equity Chorus Call is on Friday.

GO.

Jury Duty

This past Monday, I had a unique opportunity to witness the American Justice System at work.

I had Jury Duty.

I was actually excited about it. Being no stranger to Equity Chorus Calls, the prospect of getting up at 6am to go sit in a room doing nothing for a few hours seemed like a regular Monday to me, and I had nothing else to do that day, so that aspect didn't really bother me.

I went to Benjamin N. Cardozo High School, which had a specialized Law Program of which I was a member. I took criminal and civil law classes all through my last three years there, and I really loved them. They were easily my favorite subjects. I didn't continue through college because I wanted to concentrate on Theatre, but I've often thought that if I weren't going to be an Actor I would want to be a Lawyer.

So naturally, I was really excited at the prospect of serving on a jury. It was a civil court, too, which had always been my preference. Love those torts.

Best part of Jury Duty by far was the Court Officer, Mike. He was HIGHlarious. Every single thing he said was completely infused by how much he hated his life and every single person in the room in front of him. And I can't blame him, based on the people I was surrounded by. He repeated the instruction, "Unfold your juror information card," three times, and even demonstrated, and there were still about three people who didn't understand what he was talking about.

We filled out the questionaire, handed in our ballots, and then we watched Mrs. Doubtfire.

Then I took a little nap.

Then I chatted with Mike a bit.

Then we had lunch.

Then we watched "Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade."

And then we went home. Seriously.

Mike comes into the room with a stack of papers and says, "Okay happy jurors, I have some good news." Pause. "I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by switching to Geico."

Nice.

But the actual good news was that we were all being dismissed. Without even being looked at by no lawyers or nothing. So he's calling out names to come and get our dismissal papers, and he's going alphabetically, and he doesn't call my name.

It occurs to me that maybe not everyone is going home now, and maybe not having your name called meant you were going to be questioned by the lawyers as a potential juror. But the room got emptier and emptier and soon I was the only one left.

Mike looks up at me and goes, "What happened?" with this little smirk on his face.

He had my paper. He wanted to call me last so that he could ask for my phone number.

Most creative way I've ever been hit on, I have to say.

Audition Log: 9/26/09

The Grown-ups Playground

Initially I was really excited about this audition. The times were listed as 3-5 but I was asked to come to the entire two hours as there would be a lot of improv and ensemble stuff happening.

I've heard that auditioners can tell in the first few minutes of the auditions whether it's a yes or a no. I now believe that I can also tell in the first few minutes of the audition whether or not the thing I'm auditioning for is going to be worth the struggle.

The verdict for the Grown-Ups Playground?

No.

Now, being that this is a public blog that could easily end up biting me in the behind if I say too many offensive things about people, I don't want to have to sugar-coat EVERY single thing I put in here.

I arrived to the audition early to find myself standing outside the New York Comedy Club with one other girl who was also auditioning. The building was closed. The gate was down. Thankfully we were only standing out there for a few minutes before someone came to let us in.

If I was holding an audition at 3pm, I might consider arriving at 2:30 since any actor with good manners is going to get there early.

Yes: 0
No: 1

The woman who was auditioning us (Joy) finally did arrive. The first thing we did was get into a circle and play a Name Game, which makes a lot of sense at an ensemble audition. Most of us had already done introductions while we were waiting, but there were people there I didn't know.

Yes: 1
No: 1

The next half an hour was spent trying to play three warm-up ensemble improv games. I say "trying" because halfway through, the door opened and a man with a moustache popped his head in and said "Oh no." Realizing that there was an audition going on, he quickly began to retreat. But Joy saw him, cried in a very loud voice, "Is that Flum?! Come back here you BASTARD!" and then ran out of the room, chased him down the hall and brought him in.

Apparently, this gentleman was a former member of the company who had gone to LA and come back to the see the show that the GUP was doing that night.

This would have been the time for a brief introduction, and for Joy to ask him to come back later, or perhaps for Flum himself to say something like, "Well, I see you're busy auditioning, I'll come back later."

Nope.

What actually ended up happening was this: Flum came in and took a seat. This alone would have been fine. It was an ensemble audition anyway, most of us didn't mind having someone else watching.

Unfortunately, everything we did from then on was interrupted almost every five minutes with Joy and Flum "catching up." Such as, in the middle of a writing exercise, Joy burst out with, "Did you hear Otto's Diner closed?" And thus ensued a ten-minute conversation.

Yes: 1
No: 2

A few more times, Flum decided to interrupt our audition with some catchphrase or reference to an inside joke, and Joy would tell us the story behind the funny phrase or voice, thus wasting even more time.

Yes: 1
No: 3

And then there was the point at which everyone had to stop to sing Happy Birthday to Richard, one of the men auditioning. We also passed around a birthday card to sign for him.

I wrote,

Dear Richard,
This is the weirdest audition I've ever been on.
Happy Birthday

If we do get a callback (based on what, I wonder) we're supposed to hear sometime this week. I haven't decided whether or not I may be attending said callback, should I get one. But the numbers don't lie.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Personal crisis...

So... I got asked to audition for a Shakespeare company on Sunday, but I was working so I had to reschedule for today. The auditions on Sunday were at Ripley Grier, but today they're at the company's homebase. I've just found out that the "homebase" in question is a JCC in Harlem.

I can't figure out if not going to this audition makes me a scared little white girl, or a snob.

The way I see it, this is a repeat of the situation I was in last year when I did "Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat" in Bay Ridge. A two-hour train ride to rehearse in the basement of a church for no money and too much stress.

And taking the bus through Harlem at night doesn't sound appealing.

Yeah, I don't think I'm going to go.

I'm going to have to make this up to my karma though. Looks like I'm going to have to do some serious Open Call action this upcoming week.

Decided to start my karma repair by registering for one of Jen Rudolph's Green Room workshops. They're these really awesome workshops, of only about 8 students each. They have a different casting director come in every Monday for you to meet and talk to and form a relationship with. She also does Agent Nights every month where you can audition for a bunch of agents at one time. Right now there's a promotion going on to get into an Agent Night for free if you register for the Green Room, so I decided to do it.

Until I got to the website and realized that the Green Room costs 500 freaking dollars.

Maybe next month.

Or year.

Or whatever...

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

It is a fact...

I cannot watch "The Color Purple" without crying. Several times.

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Rehearsal Log: 9/19/09

Had our first reading for "Slice of Life."

Two of the actors weren't there, but I got to meet the guy playing my love interest, Alex. His name is Patrick and he seems just perfect. He's like a little puppy, I just want to put him in a Sailor Suit and make him sing and dance.

I also got to meet Neil, who is playing the manager of the Pizza Place. I don't have any scenes with him, so if not for this reading I would never have gotten to meet him!

I really don't know a lot about the New York Film Academy, but this film seems to have a pretty serious budget. The last scene takes place in a hospital room, and Louis was talking about BUILDING a room.

Most fun of the day came at the end. My character is a movie star, and there's both a film poster and a newspaper article in the movie that both have pictures of me. The film poster was just a straight-forward smiling close-up, but for the newspaper article Louis wanted to do a paparazzi shot. So I put on my glasses and my big scarf, (luckily I had an improbably huge purse with me) and he stood across the street and took pictures of me hailing a cab and crossing the street.

And even though it looked completely staged and there was really onlt one guy with a camera hounding me, people were still looking at me like, "who is that?"

Monday, September 14, 2009

Success

Apparently the audition for "Slice of Life" went very well, because I got it!

We start shooting in October, and the first meeting with the rest of the cast and crew is this Saturday.

I'm really excited about it! I've been trying to get together enough material to make up a decent Demo Reel, and I think this film is exactly the kind of thing I need. I'm the only girl, I'm the romantic female lead, and it's a good chunk of film. It looks like it has the potential to be something I can really be proud of. I loved the two other short films I'd done for NYFA, but those were both black and white ten-minute films with no dialogue. This is a much bigger project. So I'm excited.

I'm mostly excited to meet the rest of the cast, especially the pizza boy I'm supposed to fall in love with.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

How frightening it is to try...

I guess when you sit around your apartment watching TV, waiting for your big break to come to you, even if you don't say it outright to yourself, in the back of your mind you can justify your lack of accomplishment by the fact that you haven't gone on more than an audition a month for the past two years.

Once you start going, and trying and getting yourself out there, the "Well I'm not really trying" place becomes the, "I must not be good enough" place.

A bit scary.

Not true, obviously. But a bit scary nonetheless.

Not auditioning was a great way for me to escape noticing how bad I am at auditioning. I hope I'm getting better. By January I hope to be confident enough to do one of those seminars where you audition for a bunch of agents at once. It costs money though, which is why I'm not doing it until I know I can rock out.

In the meantime, besides the "You Suck" Bunnies that creep into my consciousness from time to time, I'm feeling good. I think something is about to happen to me. Speaking of which, I received an email a few weeks ago that I forgot to blog about in my Audition fury.

It was from a director/visual artist who is doing a piece on what it costs to be an actor. And not just emotionally, but literally. The focus of his piece is going to be on headshots, cover letters and resumes. Things that actors pay to have printed and spend money sending out to agents who just throw most of them out.

My headshot (probably my old black and white one) has come across his collection and he's going to be including it in the exhibition. It's very exciting to know that I'm going to be a part of this art exhibit! At least if my headshot got thrown away, it's not going to waste!

And he also said he read my blog, which he thought talked about the business in a "totally direct, honest and hopeful way." It was very nice to know that my mom and Jen Whitton aren't the only ones who read this.

His name is David Levine, and the show is going to be at Cabinet Magazine's exhibition space in Brooklyn from October 3rd until October 24th. Here's the link:

David Levine: Hopeful

Hmm...only a month into my 24th year and I'm already one step closer to global fame.

Audition Log: 9/8/09

"Slice of Life" Callback
West Village
4:30pm

I take the train down from work, where I have been answering phones and taking reservations since 8:45am. It's in the 14th St/8th Ave area, of which I have always been a fan, with its charming outdoor cafes and gay couples walking hand in hand.

When I got to their office/apartment there was no answer, but as I was standing at the door, Louis the director came up to me from across the street. He and his partner Thomas were at an outdoor cafe across the street, having coffee and smoking cigarettes.

So french. I loved it.

We did another scene, and then we talked a little about the character. I'm lucky because Lisa is the kind of character I can really relate to, so I had a pretty in depth view on her characterization and junk. I think my reading might have been a little weak. One of the scenes they had me do didn't have any dialogue, and I had a little trouble focusing. Which is odd since reacting is usually one of my stronger points as an actor.

They told me that I would hear from them by the next day (today) and that I was definitely in their top few choices, which was very nice to hear.

All in all I think it was a very positive audition, despite my lack of focus.

Next Audition:
U.S. and U.K. Stiletto Entertainment (Cruise Line!)
Sept 15th and 16th
Chelsea Studios

Monday, September 7, 2009

Audition Log: 9/5/09

NYFA, "Slice of Life"
Shetler Sutdios, 11:30am

I got there early, because I had to work that day. One of my co-workers was covering the first hour or so of my shift for me, so I was hoping I could get seen a little early and get to the restaurant by noon. So I got there at 11:00 and sure enough, I went right into the audition room.

I was very pleasantly surprised to discover that the director was French, which explained the couple of spelling mistakes in the e-mail I received from him. Not too big a deal, but I've found that usually when I get an email with spelling mistakes in it, I end up in a room with some guy who has no idea what he's talking about. But this time it was totally awesome. He seemed to really know what he was talking about, and since I was early, I got to have a nice, leisurely audition. I did my monologue, then read the sides, then did the sides again with an adjustment from the director, and then I got to do my monologue again. It was awesome.

I got a callback, which was either for today or tomorrow, and they sent me the script. I'm going in tomorrow so I have some time to read the script and get familiar with it. It's a really cute script, very Notting Hill. I'm really excited about the callback.

In other audition news, I heard from this other short film. The director/producer told me that the role I'd submitted for was already cast, but he asked me if I thought I was a good fit for the lead, Rosalita. According to him, Rosalita is Latin or Italian, with long black hair and a good figure.

Not the kind of role I usually go for, but I think with some strategically placed double-stick tape and a lot of eyeliner, I could pull it off. I've already got my audition outfit picked out. He's supposed to call me later to set something up.

Now I am off to cook dinner for my family and look over the script for "Slice of Life" one more time.

Onward, ho.

Next Audition:
"Slice of Life" callback
Tomorrow at 4:30pm

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Audition Log: 9/1/09

For "The Trestle at Pope Lick Creek"\
by the Rapscallion Theatre Collective

I arrive at 7:30pm. Audition is next to a tap class. Holy God is it noisy in this hallway. I think this is one of those classes where they don't require tap shoes, and just let the students stomp around in their regular shoes.

Monologue went well . Like my recent discovery that coffee wakes you up in the morning, I am forced to admit that I'm better off doing a monologue that I've worked on before. I did Bug from Cherry Smoke, and I did really well.

They asked me about my schedule, which as it stands now, kind of sucks for their rehearsal schedule. They asked me how flexible it was and I kind of got nervous and choked a bit while trying to explain that my schedule can change. I got a little nervous because I didn't want my schedule to be the deciding factor in whether or not I get a callback.

But really, I want to be an actor, not a hostess. A show would be my priority.

I didn't get a callback, but this marathon of auditioning is making me really competitive. The more I go on, the less of a big deal they seem. That first audition last Monday, i was all, "I'll just do my best, and we'll see what happens." This next one though, I'm gonna be all, "I SHALL DO THE GREATEST JOB I HAVE EVER DONE IN MY LIFE!"

And that's exactly what I'm going to do at my...

wait for it...

Next Audition:
"Slice of Life" a NYFA film
Saturday Sept 5, at 11:30am
This is one of my appointment auditions.

And I shall do the greatest job I have ever done in my life.

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

In honor of September first...

I have decided it's fall. I am wearing a long-sleeved shirt no matter how hot I get. My summer wardrobe has been completely exhausted. There are only so many permutations you can get out of five tank tops and three pair of shorts.

I miss sweaters and jackets. Of them I have many.

In other news I really want hot wings, but have no cash, and if I'm going to go to the ATM, what's the point of calling the delivery guy?

I'll probably still end up going to the ATM though. It's a lot closer than Ginos.

In other news, my karma seems to have really approved. Funny story, a few weeks ago I realized that one actually has to GO on auditions in order to get jobs. It also helps that we're coming out of the summer season, so things are picking up. There aren't a lot of auditions over the summer because everyone's away doing Summer Stock.

But I went to two open calls Monday and Tuesday, and then got three by appointment auditions. It's starting to look like the more I put into it, the more I get back. Which I guess makes sense.

Friday, August 28, 2009

Audition Log: 8/28/09

The Importance of Being Earnest
The Counting Squares Theatre

Counting Squares is a relatively new company that was formed by three graduates from the University of Central Florida. Now I've had plenty of experience with theatre companies formed by people who met in college (Hi Clockwork guys), but unlike Clockwork, I thought I might have a chance of getting cast in one of their shows.

Just kidding.

Kind of.

It was for the Importance of Being Earnest, which I was in in college. And do you ever look at pictures of yourself from shows in college and think, "Gee, I wonder how different that scene would have been if I'd had an objective"? I do.

The audition was on St. Mark's, on the same street where I shot that Hair Growth Shampoo commercial last summer. The rehearsal space was a bar, so that was cool and kind of chill. I did two monologues, one from "An Ideal Husband," to demonstrate my handle of the style, and the other was "The Altruists" by Nicky Silver, for pure comedy.

I was the last one to do my monologue, but I got there so early that there were about six people in front of me. They laughed a lot more at my monologues than I thought they would. When people are sitting in a room listening to a bunch of monologues that are supposed to be funny, making them laugh is a hard job. But they seemed willing to laugh, which is cool.

I didn't get a callback, but I think I did a pretty good job, my contemporary monologue especially.

Next audition:
"The Trestle at Pope Lick Creek"
Tuesday, 8pm

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Audition Log: 8/25/09

Up once again at 6:15am, which is the earliest I can recall actually hearing my alarm, which means I must have hit the snooze button twice in total unconsiousness.

Came very, VERY close to not going, since I was so exhausted from the day before, but I knew I'd regret it, so I dragged my butt out of bed and into the shower.

Got to the studio around 8, once again surprised there weren't more people there. Number nine on the sign-in sheet yet again. Booyah.

The auditioners arrive at 9, but they aren't honoring the unofficial sign-in sheet so we have to get signed in again. By then there are more people there so my number gets bumped from 9 to 21. Awesome.

Run into Lauren Lucksavage, fellow New Paltzer. Haven't seen her since sophmore year when she transfered to another school. She remarked that I am the first person from our class in New Paltz that she has seen out on an audition. Struck me as kind of odd, but I'm just getting back into auditioning after a long hiatus, so I'm not one to judge.

Sang "Stars and the Moon" and "Tell Me on a Sunday." Both sounded good but I still didn't have a clear enough focus during either song. I walked out and didn't really remember what i did, which is never a good sign.

I think it's because I'm so out of practice with musical auditions. I've been doing mainly film and some straight play stuff for the past year. It's easy for me to sleepwalk through a song because how it's SUPPOSED to sound is so finely mapped by notes and beats and so on. Whereas a monologue is just words on a page. Tone, rhythm and inflection all depend on what I'm doing with it. So singing a song is almost like going through my monologue ahead of time and deciding exactly how I'm going to say each word.

I think I just need to get back in the habit, like Sister Act Two. And I'm definitely going to keep my eye out for more cruise line auditions, because it sounds like a pretty sweet deal.

Next audition:
"The Importance of Being Earnest" by the Counting Squares Theatre.
Friday at 11:30am
I have an actual appointment for this one.
V. exciting.

Monday, August 24, 2009

Audition Log: 8/24/09

Open call for "In the Mood"

Got home from work last night at 12:30am, wide awake and still wired. But I poured myself a glass of wine and settled down to watch the new episode of True Blood in bed. (Okay, it was a rum and coke, but "glass of wine" make my impending alcoholism seem less serious)

Fell asleep somewhere past 2am, up at 6:15. Managed to get out of the house by 7:20 and was in the city by 8. Realized halfway between Queens and Manhattan that in my haste to curl my hair this morning, I forgot to brush my teeth.

Ew.

8:15 am I arrive at the studio and put my name on the unofficial sign-up sheet. I am number 9. Unfortunately, Ripley Grier does not open until 9am, so I sit on the floor outside the doors, do my make-up, and when the doors open I immediately buy gum.

Am the only girl who came already dressed in heels and a dress, rather than in sweats and flip-flops with a dress and heels in my bag, and thus feel like somewhat of a chode.

9:15am
Am surprised there aren't more girls here. Things are looking good.

9:30am
My friend Sarah arrives. Huzzah!

10:00am
Overhear some girls talking about a friend who is at another audition studio putting them on the list for Footloose. I didn't even know Footloose was having an audition today, and make a note to be more vigilant about finding out what auditions are happening when.

10:45am
Actually get to sing, which is a fine change from getting typed out or turned away. And we're doing BOTH songs. I am singing "With Every Breath I Take" from City of Angels, and "I Get a Kick Out of You" from Anything Goes.

With Every Breath went well. Intro was a little shaky, I haven't sung it with a piano for a while and the recording is a bit lower, so my first note was off but I fixed myself. "I Get a Kick" was fun, and they seemed to really like that one, but I didn't breathe right, and by the end of the first phrase I was about ready to pass out.

Other than that I think it went well. I was back on the train by 11:15am.

Next Audition:
Open Call for Gary Musick Productions
Casting Singers and Dancers for Celebrity Cruises, Norwegian Cruise Line and Oceana Cruises
Tomorrow, 9am
Shetler Studios

Balls to the wall.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Random thought for the morning...

As much as I enjoy the band 3OH!3, I always feel like they're yelling at me.

And a little misogynistic.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

The Countdown Begins...

I have three hundred and fifty-five days until I turn twenty-five. Therefore I have three hundred and fifty-five days to become successful, or get into one of the unions, or become incredibly famous. And if I don't, I move to LA, where I will spend all of my days away from everything that makes me feel comfortable.

I made an important stride in my career today.

My parents paid for my subscription to Backstage and Backstage.com as a graduation present two years ago. At the end of the year, it was automatically renewed. I didn't notice, since it wasn't my credit card statement. All I know is I kept getting the paper every week, so I didn't complain. They never said anything, so I just let it go.

This year my parents got a new credit card, and so on August 1st I received an email that the credit card number I had on file was no longer good and my subscription would not be renewed.

So now I am proud to say that I am officially paying for my own subscription to Backstage. Which I hope means that I will use it more.

It was a lovely gift from my parents who have always supported me in this crazy dream of mine, but after the first year I should have taken up the mantle myself. The more I allow things like that to happen, the more laxidasical my life will become.

Laxidasical is definitely the word I want to use there. But I have no idea how to spell it.

Lack-si-daiz-i-cal. You'll figure it out. You're smart peoples.

Now that I'm paying out of pocket for this subscription, I had better utilize it more fully than I have for the past two years. I just set up my whole online resume on the website so that I can submit for job postings directly, instead of having to attach my headshot and resume to an email, which is truly a pain in the ass.

Very excited about the next audition lined up on my calendar. It's an open call for "In The Mood" which is a tour of a 1930s-1940s musical review.

Several things are looking like they are in my favor:
  1. It is an open call, which means the sign up sheet is the sign up sheet, regardless of Union affiliations. Therefore, I have as much of a chance at being seen as any Equity girl (in theory)
  2. They only want altos, not sopranos, so that's a whole bunch of girls out already
  3. I have the perfect audition song, which my voice teacher gave me because he was "so excited to finally teach someone with a low enough voice to sing it."
  4. They want girls with a 1940s look, which I definitely have.
It would be awesome to get a tour right now. I'm hitting the two year itch, having been at the same job and in the same apartment this whole time. I want a change of scenery.

Also, my new headshots were finally delivered. It's the same picture that's on my business card, but looking at them so much bigger makes a world of difference. This has got to be the most favorite picture of myself I have ever taken. I think I look beautiful. I literally stared at it for a good ten minutes when I took them out of the box yesterday.

God I'm hot.

Saturday, August 15, 2009

Audition Log: 8/13/09

"Hair" Equity Chorus Call.

Ah, now I remember why I stopped doing Equity calls.

My audition buddy Harmony was set to arrive at Chelsea studios at 7am to put our names on the list. Received a text from her at 8:53am: "Not doing list until 1pm and I can't put your name right after mine..."

Apparently a few weeks ago some girl showed up with a pre-made list of about 25 people that had been written the night before, so now they weren't allowing anyone to put any names down aside from there own. Why does there always have to be some bitch who ruins it for everyone?

So I got there around 11:30 and met Harmony. They started the sign-up sheet at 12:30 but it was a madhouse. We were numbers 49 and 50.

Messed around for a while, checked back at 3:30 and were told that they weren't going to see any Non-Equity because they're going to be having an open call in the next couple of weeks.

So I rode the loser train home and then fell asleep.

Next audition: Monday, August 24th. National Tour of "In The Mood," a 1940s musical revue. It's an Open Call, so hopefully I'll get seen.

Onward ho.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Coffee good...

Well it's 5:30 in the morning and I just ripped my jeans.

Ironically, they were the jeans I bought with the holes already ripped into the front of the legs in order to make them look hip and worn-in. (It's also the reason they cost more than a whole pair of pants)

And I ripped them right in the back of the leg, right under the butt cheek. Not a tragedy, but changes the entire tone of the pants. What were once just a casual pair of jeans to throw on to go to the store now require a spicy pair of heels and a lot of confidence.

Yes America, this is my upper thigh.

Enjoy.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Make Me a SuperStar

The time has come in the night where one must choose between bed and coffee. I have chosen coffee.

First thought of the night: It amuses me that in the scene in Atonement in which Kiera Knightly's little sister comes to visit her first thing in the morning, Kiera Knightly answers the door in a bathrobe, but with her hair and make-up done.

Secondly, after nearly a month since I first received the email, I've gotten my act together and recorded my video audition tape for "Make Me a Super Star."

The scene is chosen from ones that they provide on the website. It sounds like it's straight out of 90210, and since I am currently obsessed with 90210 (huzzah Netflix) I'm a happy bunny.

Although it's not the scene I would have chosen for my audition, but there wasn't a comedic choice for women among the scene choices, sad face. Anyway, the video is posted on Facebook, and I'll probably put it up on the YouTube page as well. It's kind of Soap Opera-y, which has never been my greatest strength as an actor. You have to be just right to read those kinds of lines and not sound like a jackass.

I remember I took a Soap Opera Acting workshop in college, and one of my lines was, "You are the worst human being I've ever met in my life," and for some reason I just couldn't deliver it without getting a laugh.

But alas, I think the more interesting part of the video is the beginning in which I talk about myself, and my natural personality is all up in that biznitch.

My motivation in this is about equal parts wanting to be a superstar, and wanting to be on a reality tv show. Oxygen was showing its daily America's Next Top Model marathon and I got sucked in, yet again. God I wish I was thin enough to be on that show. I would rock the shit out of that show. I would send that show home crying to it's mama.

I mean, don't get me wrong, the goal of my life is going to be a long-running quest toward becoming the greatest actor on the planet, but the way I see it, I could become the greatest actor on the planet, and THEN become famous, or I could become famous, and THEN become the greatest actor on the planet. Meh.

When I was younger I wanted to be famous. I wanted photos of me buying toothpaste to appear in US Weekly. And then I got to college and I learned that in order to have a fulfilling life as an actor, your priority should be the quality of your work, and not the degree of your fame. I realized there was something noble about spending those character-building years paying your Student Loans late and eating dry Rice-a-Roni out of the box with a plastic spoon. As long as you maintained your integrity.

Two years post-graduation: Fuck integrity, I'd like a personal shopper.

Sunday, August 9, 2009

Happy Birthday to Me

I turned twenty-four on Saturday.

So I obviously had the obligatory "Oh my God, I'm twenty-four and I haven't accomplished anything in my life" Freak Out.

But I've figured out a way to deal with it.

Obviously, I haven't accomplished as much as I would like. In fact, this past year has kind of just been a giant ball of Nothing wrapped in a crispy crust of You're a Lazy Bitch.

I have decided that this year I have to step up my game. And in order to make sure that this happens, I am giving myself a deadline. I have decided to set a specific, attainable goal for myself. And if that goal is not reached by the time I turn twenty-five, I have decided that I am moving to LA.

Because once I'm in LA, I won't have my family or my neighborhood to fall back on. I won't feel safe and comfortable and therefore it will not be as acceptable to me to go back to sleep instead of getting up to make it to that audition at 6:30 in the morning. I'll be 3,000 miles away from everything I've ever known, and most likely scared shitless.

So there you go.

As for what my goal for the year will be, I'm still not sure. I was thinking maybe soap opera, or maybe giving myself like, a certain amount of money, and if I'm not making that much money per month on pure acting gigs, then I'm off to LA.

Further review is needed.

I'll tell you one thing I'm sure of though: Alexander Skarsgard looks damn hot in the tank top that he was wearing in the last two episodes of "True Blood"

Thursday, August 6, 2009

Up all night...

Things i Currently Hate:
  • Long train rides
  • Cheap headphones that break after a week and a half
  • People
  • Teenagers especially
  • My job
  • Expired milk
  • Not being a famous movie star
  • Not knowing how to drive
  • My passport photo
  • Not using my passport for anything other than buying beer
  • Tyra Banks
  • Chase bank
  • Sarah Palin
  • My computer
  • Vanessa Hudgens
Things i Currently Love:
  • Coffee
  • Peanut Butter M&Ms
  • "The Climb" by Miley Cyrus
I think when your survival job becomes more time consuming than auditioning, taking classes and generally advancing your career, the time has come to re-evaluate your options.

Coming soon:
  • Hair audition on Thursday
  • Awesome b-day party
  • Clockwork theatre weekly scene workshops
  • Improv 301 at UCB
Breathe, Michele. Just breathe. 23 kind of sucked. 24 will be much better.

This is going to be the Jack Bauer of all years.

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

Fail...

Why do I feel like everything I do is mediocre?

Headshots have been shipped. They are on their way. Hopefully they will arrive before the 13th so that I can rock the socks off of the Hair audition.

Saturday is my 24th birthday.

I have been out of school for two years.

And I have Jack to show for it.

As my birthday present, my parents are allowing me to charge a class at the Upright Citizen's Brigade on their credit card, since I can no longer afford it. I am immensely happy about this, since it's been over six months since I took my 201 class, and if I don't hurry up and take 301, I'm going to forget everything I learned.

This past year has been shit. I got into two shows and quit them both.

And let's see... what else has happened.

Hmm... nothing...

Way to go, McNally.

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Foiled again...

Yet another chapter in the Book of Fail.

I was all set to go to a workshop about the Business of Acting, given by Jeff Mitchell of Mitchell/Rudolph Casting. It was only $25 for three hours and it was all about ways the actor can break in and get his or her name out there. We were also supposed to bring our headshots and Jeff was going to go through them all and say what worked and what didn't work about them.

All in all, an opportunity to learn and network and exchange some business cards. (I have business cards, didn't you know?)

So... I had ordered some headshots to be printed at CVS. I figured I'd get ten 8 by 10s to tide me over before I could go to a Reproduction place and get like 100. I put in the order online and they were supposed to be ready for pick up by 4:45 today. Plenty of time for me to get to my 7pm seminar.

Well, I must have been smoking something because I left the house late and ended up running to CVS in three inch stilettos (I was dressed to impress)

I got there JUST IN TIME to throw money at the cashier, and get back on the bus in time to make my train into the city. But as soon as I told the girl my name, she looked down at the pile of envelopes on her counter (none of which looked like it contained any 8" by 10"s and said, "I don't think you're in here."

She ended up having to call the company, and it turns out that my order didn't go through, even though I recieved a confirmation email. Not only did I not have my headshot, by the time we worked everything out, I had missed my train.

I ended up hopping the bus to Mom and Dad's, drowning my sorrows in a Blimpie's sandwich, and going home. I watched a documentary on JK Rowling and shot the first half of my audition video for Make Me a Superstar.

My intro could only be one minute (the rest of the tape is reserved for a scene) but I shot about 15 minutes of unused footage. Expect a blooper reel.

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Back on the Horse...

Thanks to a brand-spanking new $200 in my pocket, it looks like I can finally get some new headshots printed. Therefore, it looks like my audition hiatus is coming to an end pending a trip to Kinkos. Booyah.

Also, remember that management company I had that audition appointment for? Well they emailed me the morning of my audition with a email that said, "Unfortunately our casting director is stuck out of town and we have to postpone your audition. We will contact you sometime next week to reschedule." That was month ago. I finally sent them a WTF email on Tuesday, but I haven't heard back yet.

Today though, I got an email about this brand new reality show called "Make Me A Superstar" which is kind of like "Make Me a Supermodel" (in both theme and title) but for actors.

FINALLY.

I went on the website to see how to audition, and get this: They're using FACEBOOK. You have to upload a three minute video onto facebook and then add them as a friend so they can watch it. And then, once you've done this, you have to paste the exact phrase "Hey guys, check out my audition video for the upcoming reality show, "Make Me a Superstar" Find more info on makemeasuperstar.tv" as your status.

Am I doing this?

You bet your sweet ass I am.

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Dear Michele:

Update your website.

Love,
Michele

Thursday, July 2, 2009

My review of Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen

Last night, in a feat of impromptu glory, Jen and I decided to catch the 11:30pm showing of Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. Needless to say, we didn't get out until almost 2:30am.

My verdict: It was awesome.

I went into the first Transformers movie not quite knowing what to expect. I mean, the entire franchise is based on action figures, which is a form of children's entertainment that has basically been made obsolete nowadays because of hand-held gaming systems. Very rarely so I see kids above toddler age playing with dolls of any kind. As soon as their hand-eye coordination gets good enough, they opt for buttons and touch-screens.

But I used to watch Transformers on Sunday mornings and after school when I was a kid, so of course I went to the movie to see the amazing special effects. Shia LeBeouf notwithstanding.

What really ended up surprising me was how funny the movie was. It seemed like the kind of Transformers movie that I would write. I mean yeah, it's about giant robots having a war, which is at once unbelievable and a little stupid really. But the movie doesn't take itself too seriously, which makes it good.

Now, Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen is definitely for people who liked the first one. Makes sense. You might go see the original out of morbid curiosity, but if you didn't like it, and then you go see the sequel, it's your fault that you're disappointed. You have to like Transformers to like Revenge of the Fallen. The humor is still there, but for the most part its overshadowed by the IMMENSELY complicated plot.

In my opinion, though my expectations had been low before the first movie, Shia LeBeouf is the best source for comedic material. He has a few good stream-of-concious monologues in the beginning of the film, but later his character is too caught up in the circumstances of the movie to reall ymake light of them. So they stick John Tuturro in as the clown. A graduate of SUNY New Paltz (represent!) he does a pretty decent job, but it takes some suspension of disbelief.

I am a big fan of the addition of Sam's brand new college roommate, played by Ramon Rodriguez, whose main function is to get slapped around and cry. He does it well.

Megan Fox is hot as usual. As are Josh Duhamel and Tyrese Gibson, but WAY underdeveloped. Sgt. Lennox(Duhamel)'s wife and baby are completely absent from the story, which was pretty much the only thing that gave his character any depth in the first movie. And while they try to give Gibson's character a few witty one-liners, they fall a little flat.

If we're talking Smash, Bang, Crash, this movie is the greatest thing I've ever seen in my life. Massive civilian casualties: Funny every time. The action sequences are so good there were literally times when I had tears in my eyes. Virtually every historical landmark ever was destroyed.

All in all, this movie was fun. It was not a life-changing film experience, but it was a damn good time. And there were SEVERAL scrotum jokes. Always fun.

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Recession Homework...

I hate being broke.

Or rather, I hate having money in the bank that I can't spend because the two bills I paid three days ago still haven't shown up on my bank statement on Chase.com. That website needs to get its shit together, STAT.

Seriously, the other day one of my debits disappeared. The money resurfaced in my account. And then the next day it was back, and there went that $30 again.

But I'm dealing with my temporary monetary lull the best way I can. I have a little cash set aside so that I can get headshots printed and start going out on auditions again. Thank God, because I'm getting stir crazy just sitting around the house.

But until that happens, I've been reading a bunch. I cracked open Sanford Meisner's "On Acting" once again. I don't think I ever actually read that book all the way through. I've decided to cycle through all my acting books one more time. All of them, not just the ones I think make me look cool sitting up on my bookshelf. I figure I'll just fill my head with as much wisdom as possible, and maybe once I've absorbed all the knowledge, I'll be able to sift through all the crap and actually work out this Technique thing everyone's talking about.

Summer Reading List:
"On Acting," Sanford Meisner
"The Practical Handbook for the Actor," Lots-o-People
"Respect for Acting," Uta Hagen
"Audition," Michael Shurtleff
"True and False," David Mamet
"The Actor Speaks," Patsy Rodenburg
"An Actor Prepares," Constantin Stanislavski
"A Challenge for the Actor," Uta Hagen

Maybe once I've actually read all these books all the way through, I'll have some sense of what I'm doing.

Sunday, June 21, 2009

You know what sucks worse than moving?

Not moving.

That is to say, packing all your worldly positions up into plastic bags and piling them in the middle of the floor, and then staring at them for ten days, unable to unpack.

This is your life when you have bedbugs to contend with.

Or rather, this is:

It sucks. It sucks balls. I packed everything up before the exterminator came last Friday, and he comes for his second treatment tomorrow morning. So finally, tomorrow I'll be able to unpack everything and set my apartment up again.

But in the meantime, I had to wash and dry every piece of clothing I own. I spent about $50 on laundry and that's not even including dry-cleaning which I haven't done yet, because I can't afford it. All my dry-clean only stuff is still sealed up in bags.

I had to vacuum and wipe down all my books and DVDs and clear all my shelves.

It's been a giant ball of suck.

And I'm broke. Largely because of this. Ex-college roommate and best friend Cate Fricke is in town, so I've been going out, but I haven't been spending money on drinks. And most of my food this week has been Family Meal at work. I've even been stashing leftovers and bringing them home.


Mostly though, we've been doing free things, such as the free movie in Bryant Park. It rained, so we couldn't sit on the lawn, but we managed to get a pretty good spot. We were going to wait out the rain, but all of a sudden, it started to POUR.

We ended up soaked to the bone.

The thing that sucks the most about being caught in a rainstorm that only lasts five minutes: Inevitably you will end up somewhere where the people are not wet, because they didn't happen to be outside for the five minutes of Hurricane George. So they always look at you like you're crazy for being wet.

We didn't end up seeing the movie. Instead we went to a bar. It was fun.

But the trump card of the week was by far Shakespeare in the Park. For those of you who don't know, the play this summer is Twelfth Night starring Anne Hathaway (Oscar nominee and personal hero of mine--She's on my Wall of Inspiration), Raul Esparza (four-time Tony Winner), and Audra McDonald (four-time Tony winner, ass-load of other awards too.)

I have a bit of a history with Raul Esparza.

That is to say, I am in frigging LOVE with him. I took this picture for my friend Evan who was playing Bobby in "Company" up at New Paltz.

He autographed the sign too.

Anyway, I've never done Shakespeare in the Park before. What we did was, we went out to the bar on Tuesday night, and stayed out until about 4am (which is REALLY hard to do when you're not drunk). Then we went to the WestWay Diner and had some breakfast, and then we headed over to Central Park. We got there at 6:30am, and there were already about thirty people on line.

We stayed there until the box office opened at 1pm. By that time there were about 2,000 people on line, including a bunch of New Paltzians. We had a good time. We slept in the sun, and made friends with the people sitting on either side of us. On our right was a really nice guy named Jay. He's a musical theatre professor and he had an adorable dog named Chompers. So we were pretty much entertained for the majority of our massive wait on line.

After we got our tickets we walked back along the line to see how many people were still in line. It was so long! It stretched back so far, I was so glad we got there when we did. Quick nap at home, and we headed back to see the show.

Anne Hathaway really impressed me. I think I read in her bio that she hadn't really done much Shakespeare before, but she handled it really well. And they incorporated music very beautifully in the production. Anne Hathaway has a great voice, and of course the other two leads are Tony-winners. There was this beautiful moment during which The Fool is serenading Orsino (Raul Esparza) and Raul started to sing the harmony. I almost had a heart attack.

The only time I've ever seen him live in "Speed the Plow" and he did not sing. I've only ever heard him on a recording before.

You'd think men singing really high wouldn't be attractive. But it is. As long as they don't go falsetto. Blech.

The rain held off until the very end of the show, not that I would have left it if had started earlier. But it happened during the finale song, the lines of which are, "And it raineth every day." So obviously, the crowd went wild. And the whole cast began to dance, and Anne Hathaway came running out in this beautiful white dress and Raul Esparza lifted her into his arms and spun her and she put her arms out and turned her face up to the rain and it was just GORGEOUS.

Best day.

Tuesday I'm going to Florida for a few days. I'm taking some time to recover my mental health and bank account Post-Bedbug Ordeal, but I am going to be auditioning for Disney while I'm there.

Thursday, June 4, 2009

This day turned out to be much more bitchin' than I thought it would...

Went to the audition for the short film this morning. It wasn't my best. I was one of the first people there, and the scene they wanted us to read was a highly physical fight scene, so the reading I did was a little awkward.

And to top it all off, I was there for a total of fifteen minutes, and then I was out in the city at 11:30am and didn't have to be at work until 3:00.

I didn't want to go home, because most of my time would have been taken by the train ride in either direction, so I decided to see a movie. And I saw Star Trek for the third time. Awesome.

While I was in Star Trek I got a casting notice on my handy-dandy Blackberry that Rock Me TV was having an Open Call for hosts from 12 to 3pm. But I got out of the movie at 2, and I didn't think I would be out in time for work if I went over then. But then I got a text from this girl Toni asking if she could take my shift tonight in exchange for Sunday. Obviously I said yes.

I didn't have any more headshots, having given them all to the auditioners this morning, but I had my photo business cards (some of you might already be aware--I have business cards) so I went over.

I hope I'm not being too cocky. But I effing ROCKED.

It was a lot of fun. First one of the currents hosts interviewed us briefly; What's your name? Where are you from? and then we got to say "Hi, I'm Michele McNally with Rock Me TV and we're live in Times Square with a whole bunch of crazy shit..."

Just the other day I was watching Michele Merkin's interview with Chris Pine and Zachary Quinto and I was thinking how fun it would be to have some kind of interviewer/host gig. All in all I think I did a really good job. I got interviewed (off Camera) after my screen test and they seemed really positive about both my schedule and my point of view.

If I got a final callback, I'm supposed to hear by Monday.

And now...victory Sushi.

on the way to the audition...

Finally got the sides at 6:30 this morning.

3 pages. 6 typos.

Nice.

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Victory and Horror

I have $1.76 in my savings account.

Let's not get into the checking account, because it's just going to depress me.

Paycheck in T-minus a day and a half.

But on the upside, SubmissionFest '09 is proving to be a resounding success. So far I have two auditions, one for a management company, and one for a short film in which I will be reading for the part of "Vampire Queen."

Awaiting sides, which will potentially be emailed to me by midnight. It's currently 11:30pm, but I'm still optimistic.

So far I have asked six friends and family members the question: "How sad would you be if I moved to L.A." Answers have ranged from "very sad" to "Michele McNally don't you dare you *&!%*!"

Still might go though. Haven't decided yet.

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Sigh

Headshot guy spelled my name wrong.

I'm going to bed.

Tomorrow...who knows?

On Monday in the midst of my Inspiration-Spree, I cracked open "How To Be a Working Actor."

Now, this book has a lot of things in it that I find a bit unrealistic. After all, there is no specific route to take to become a working actor, so any book that boasts a "How To" is bound to have a little bit of BS in it. But it also has some really good stuff in it, including quote from people who have spent their whole lives in The Business. (And by the way, whenever they say "The Business" in this book, it's always written like that. Capital letters. The. Business.)

One of the quotes I read was from Nancy Curtis.

"In order to have a career as an actor, every day you need to do something."
Wise words. So on Monday I submitted my headshot and resume to six film projects. On Tuesday I did some work on the website, submitted to a couple of projects, and worked out for about twenty minutes. On Wednesday I had rehearsal, before which I sat down and did some serious script work.

But what did I do today?

I slept until 1:30pm and then went to work. But even though it's technically Friday now, today doesn't end until I go to sleep.

Although, today I did finally get the CD with my final headshots on it. Edited and everything.

That settles that. Today, I shall prepare to get my headshots printed so I can finally go to auditions again instead of just submitting electronically.

Huzzah.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Inspiration Sandwich

On Friday I went to the see the Clockwork Theatre's reading of "Red Masquerade." Clockwork is that Theatre Company that those guys I went to school with started a few years ago. "Red Masquerade" is a new play that was written by one of my old professors. They were doing a reading of it at Theatre Row, starring four of my old classmates, one (kind of two) of my ex-boyfriends, and one of my old professors. It was also directed by a former professor of mine.

Suffice it to say, when we went to the Irish Rogue after the show, I answered the, "So, what are you up to now" question a lot.

By now I have the, "Hey, remember that show I was in" story down, but to my utter chagrin, my answer still had traces of insecurity. That shaky little tone in my voice when I say, "Other than that, I'm just working at the restaurant. Yep, the same one. You know, makin' money."

Then on Saturday night I was watching interviews with the cast of Star Wars on YouTube, and I entered FrustrationLand. It's that place where 23 seems like 45, and all your accomplishments look like absolutely nothing, and the golden years of your life are slipping away from you at top speed, and here you are helpless to do anything about it, and you're going to be working in a restaurant for the rest of your life.

Sunday I went to work.

And Monday I went to a BBQ at Mom and Dad's house, and talked with my family about my career. Or lack thereof.

God love every one of my family and friends for their support, but if one more person asks me, "Why don't you get an agent?" like I could just waltz into Pathmark and pick one up in aisle seven, I don't know what I'm going to do.

Look people, it's not that easy.

And this early in my career (and yes, Virginia, two years in is still early) it's not really that smart.

I still have college credits on my resume. Signing with an agent means I wouldn't be able to work on anything without that agent's consent. At this juncture, it still benefits me to be free-lance. It's just fucking HARD.

Because the real appeal of an agent is the thought that it's some big suit in an ivory tower with Speilberg on the Rolodex who's going to do all the work, and all I have to do is sit in my apartment drinking Cool-Aid and eating Pop-Tarts, and wait for the phone to ring and the work to come rolling in.

Not how it works.

So last night when I got home, rather than go out to the bar with Sarah, I sat down with my copy of Backstage and my "Working Actor" books, and I jumped into the Inspiration River.

Head first.

Okay. This is my "Wall of Inspiration" collage. I started it about six months ago. It's full of pictures of artists whose work inspires me. Kate Winslet, Tina Fey, Ellen Degeneres, Chloe Sevigny, Nicole Kidman, Jason Segel, Johnny Depp.

There are theatre tickets along the top and around the side, pictures of me, quotes, my pay stubs. That sort of thing.

It's on my closet door, so I see it every day.

I added a whole mess of things to it last night. I wrote all over every free space I could find, and destroyed my April issue of Vanity Fair, the one with Paul Rudd, Jason Segel, Seth Rogen and Jonah Hill on the cover.

Here are a few more pictures:

















Monday, May 25, 2009

To the castle...

Watching interviews with some of your favorite celebrities on YouTube is a surefire way to make yourself really upset that your career isn't going as well as you'd like.

I wish I was shooting a critically acclaimed television show and touring the world promoting a totally bitchin' movie that I just shot.

But I'm not.

I almost packed all my stuff and moved to LA on Saturday night. Boo.

So today I added to my Wall of Inspiration collage and submitted my headshot and resume to six new film projects.

And now I shall search for "24" on hulu.

Onward.

Friday, May 15, 2009

omg

I'm totally updating my blog on my blackberry. On the bus from six flags. After going on Nitro three times.

I know this has nothing to do with my professional life. But its awesome.

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Submission-Fest '09

Okay. My show has been pushed to August. It is currently May 12th. I have two and a half months to do basically whatever I want, as long as it doesn't conflict with Danny and the Deep Blue Sea. So i basically have free reign to do a whole mess of low-commitment stuff.

And given that my episode of Rescue Me has just aired, I'm remembering the convenience of background work. It's one day out of life, it's a decent chunk of money, and it's a credit on the resume and a chance to be seen. That, and the NYFA films I've done recently have struck me as the perfect kind of stuff to be doing for the next few months. And if I can pick up a little money on the way, even better.

And so begins...

Submission-Fest '09

I've got my new issue of Backstage, my NYCastings, my Actor's Access and my copy of Edith Piaf's "Non, je ne regrette rein" on vinyl.

I am ready to rock.

Monday, May 11, 2009

Career milestone...

I saw myself on TV the other day!

I did background for "Rescue Me" last year, and have been waiting patiently for the new season to begin, delayed by strikes and such. But on Friday night while I was at work my mom sent me a text message. They'd been DVRing the show in hopes of seeing me and last Tuesday it finally aired.

If you happen to catch episode five of this season of Rescue Me, entitled "Sheila," I'm in the first two minutes. A fire truck pulls up, and just before Dennis Leary gets out, a girl with short brown hair in a black skirt and gray jacket walks by talking on her cellphone. And THAT, my friends, is ME!

This is a transcript of the text message conversation between me and my mom:

Mom: What were you wearing during Rescue Me?
Me: Black skirt, gray jacket
Mom: Short sleeves?
Me: Yes. Do you see me?
Mom: If it is you, you look STACKED
Me: Well, the camera does add ten pounds.

I then came home, bought it on iTunes, and yes. I look like I have enormous breasts. But it was a year ago, and I was slightly fatter.

So exciting. I can't wait till it's on hulu so I can post it! Lord, when I am older and jaded and have personal assistants who bring me water, and I have a recurring role in several Primetime dramas, and billboards of me in Subway stations, let me always remember this feeling of seeing myself on television for the first time. Because it's awesome.

Thursday, May 7, 2009

And I'm over it...

Okay.

So Ian dropped out of the show. Apparently he has some big audition for Ugly Betty and his agent advised him not to do Danny because the production team still hasn't heard back about the rights.

I can understand that on a professional level. Ian is an apprentice with the LAByrinth Theatre Company, of which John Patrick Shanley is a member. So if something goes wrong with the rights and there's some kind of a problem, it might hurt him to be involved with the show.

But in my show's defense, the rights were applied for in a timely fashion, and it's not John's fault that there's still no word. If I were him I would do the exact same thing and go ahead and rehearse. Because you don't want to NOT rehearse and then have the rights come through like a week before you wanted to do the show.

So... I'm over it. Even though I think it was really messed up that he dropped out VIA TEXT and didn't even INFORM ME when we're supposed to be like, scene buddies.

But whatever.

I will not miss feeling as though I'm going to die in a horrible car crash every time he gives me a ride to rehearsal.

That being said, I took the bus to rehearsal for the first time last night (which sucked, but I think I've got it down now). I took the train to Rego Park and went to catch the Q38 at 63rd Drive, but I got on it the wrong way, so i got off and walked back to catch it in the other direction, but I got lost. So by the time I'd found the right bus stop and after waiting 20 minutes for the bus, I get on and I realize I'm on the exact same bus with the exact same driver. It's just reached the end of the route and turned around to start again. Nice.

So I met with John and Mike and Kelly, who are the understudy/Cast B sort of people. And we discussed our options.
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I would be performing with Mike. He and I haven't rehearsed together at all, but with all the rehearsals Ian missed, we would probably be at the same place. (I'm still kind of mad. I'm allowing myself three back-handed comments about Ian being a chode. That was One.) And Ian also had a couple of very important and hard to find props, since he had done the show already. In addition to the Ian Problem, Shetler Studios fell through. John contacted the people at Roy Arias Studios and got a space there, but they required a deposit that we didn't really have. So we had two options: Put up our own money and then begin a rehearsal process so frantic that it could be a pretty bitchin' reality show. OR, postpone the show.

Kelly's going to Greece in June, so we agreed to shoot for August. So for now we can relax, take a little break, concentrate on raising more money so that we can market the shit out of this, and come back to it later ready to roll.

I think it's a solid plan.

Well, I do now. I was demoralized yesterday that when John suggested postponing the show all I could think about was the daunting concept of being involved in this project until August. I've been so frustrated with Jimmy Shits as my partner (Two) that I just wanted to get the damn thing over with. And if I could figure out some way to pants him during one of the scenes, so much the better (and thank you Sean for that suggestion). I mean this whole time I've been reading this play over and over again thinking to myself: If I Only Had The Time/Rehearsal/Morale/What Have You. I would read that third scene and think I could do that, but there's no way I was going to be able to do it in this situation.

So when John first suggested that we postpone it, I wasn't sure I wanted to stay with the production.

I mean, I try not to be a snob. I understand that as artists, we do not always have the money for fancy rehearsal spaces and designers and all the stuff we had in college. John is basically paying for this thing himself, out of pocket, so I don't mind that we rehearse at his apartment, and we have to bring in props and costumes and all that. Whatever. It's about the play. But I was so down that I just wanted to go home and cry and watch 90210 and forget the whole thing every happened.

And then Kelly and Mike did scene one.

I've known Mike since we were in first grade. Not the whole time, mind you. When I was last in school with him, he had this whole Boy Band thing going for him. We used to have Battles of the Bands during the last fifteen minutes of English class in 7th grade. And then all of a sudden I was volunteering at the American College Theatre Festival when we had it at my school, and there he was, studying Theatre and competing at the Irene Ryans.

He's at Queens College now, so I've had the pleasure of seeing him in Playboy of the West Indes, in which he had one line ("Bagpipes") but I've never really seen him act.

And by the time scene one was over, he'd flipped a fucking table over, and he was crouched on the floor crying, and I was like, "I MUST BE A PART OF THIS."

So now my initial excitement about this show is completely renewed! And I'm really happy that with all the time we have, we can make sure it's the kind of production we want it to be. And we can really advertize and get it together for an industry mailing. Maybe we can even shoot the trailer, which is an idea that never really came off the ground.

August is a long way off, it's true. But it does alleviate the pressure. And for now my friend Pierce, who has a lovely film company called Nice Dissolve, has a movie he wants me to be a part of. So I'll do that, and then return to Danny and the Deep Blue Sea. And in the meantime, I can slow down my obsessive working out, because I think I almost gave myself a hernia the other day.