My drunk self is booking gigs for my sober self

This morning while I was looking through my purse for my Metrocard, I found the business card for the General Manager of the Ha! Comedy Club on 46th Street.

I have no idea how this card got in my purse.

But I am calling this guy.

The only explanation I can think of is that I'm much better at networking when I'm blackout drunk. It's got a nice Jekyll/Hyde thing going on for itself.

I have to be off-book for the Kentucky Goblin Siege in six hours.

Rather than studying, I'm eating American Cheese while watching "How I Met Your Mother."

Confident that this evening's rehearsal will be a productive one.

Lacking the motivation to go out and buy Drano, I just attempted to clean my shower drain with a chopstick.

It did not go well.

Fail.