Ode to the Duane Reade down the block from my apartment...

Ode To The Duane Reade That Just Opened Down the Block From My Apartment:

You are far superior to the Duane Reade four blocks away from my apartment
And the Duane Reade one slightly longer block away from my apartment.
For being three times bigger than any of the others.
For having a sea-salt body scrub.
For carrying the garlic and herb cous-cous that got me through college
And the French Onion Dip that gets me through Lost
For having actually healthy foods in your vast grocery section
In addition to Easy Mac and Mama Celeste's pizza for one
For having Skim Plus milk
And cookie dough
And a free re-usable shopping bag with any purchase

But seriously, why did it take me 20 minutes to find the isle with the cat food?

What's the deal with airline food?

When someone asks you, "How was your night?" how to you convey in one simple sentence the fact that you've just had the greatest night of your life?

My stand-up debut was a great success, mostly due to all the wonderful friends who came out and supported me. About a third of the audience was there for me, and they did a great job being the most wonderful audience ever.

I'm not the only person in the show who was doing stand-up for the first time, so that calmed my nerves a bit. And I decided not really to worry about the twenty minute thing. I ended up doing only about ten, but I forgot about a chunk in the middle. If I'd remembered, it only would have been about twelve of thirteen. But the people who did go twenty minutes (or more) did seem to be talking for a VERY long time.

Now that I've done it, I'm completely in love with it. I'm definitely going to be doing it again.

And luckily, my lovely parents videotaped it upon my request, so the video will be posted soon.

You will be designing a 13th look...

I just met with one of the guys in charge of "Laugh Till It Hurts," which is the show I'm doing stand-up comedy in on Sunday. I had to drop off their portion of my ticket money, and take care of some legal stuff, like signing a waver just in case they film any part of it. That's fine with me, I'm hoping one of my friends will record my set with my camera so I can put it up on my YouTube page.

He also took me through the order of the performers and I've found out that I'm going third, out of a group of five comedians. Which I guess I'm okay with, since I'm a little unsure of how successful I'm going to be. I'm pretty sure the other four comics in the show actually have experience with stand-up comedy, so it stands to reason they'd want to stick me in the middle, since this is my first time.

And then I looked a little closer at the paper, to where it said, "Michele McNally, 7:45-8:05"

That's twenty minutes.

Twenty minutes.

Not seven to ten.

Which is what I prepared.

That's TWICE as much.

So now, Project Runway style, just when you thought you'd have the second day of the challenge to hem your skirt and fix your closures, Tim Gunn tells you you have to design a second look using only the scraps of fabric you have left over.

I'm working tonight and a double tomorrow, so basically I have a brief amount of time tonight and Sunday morning to find ten more minutes of material.

Something funny had better happen to me tonight.

Basically, I think this just means I have to revamp my approach. Twenty minutes is a very long time. I think what I have to do, (and this is also advice from the great Cate Fricke, who I called immediately, freaking out) is incorporate more of a performance. Something that's not necessarily the traditional, "Hey, who's from Long Island?" stand-up. Like the kind of stuff I used to do for Midnight Theatre in college. The problem is, I'm a little out of practice.

Thankfully, I've stacked the audience with my friends who will hopefully be drunk. So I guess it will be more like college than I'd originally thought.

Make it work.

Well, it's Thursday. The days before my stand-up comedy debut are looming fewer and fewer. And surprisingly the terror is starting to subside.

Probably because I actually wrote some material.

So good for me.

The upside is, I've sold almost all my tickets, and there are a lot of other people who are coming as well. So the pressure is really on. But as long as people are drunk, it's not really going to make a difference.

So if you're reading this, and you're coming to my show, be drunk. Be very drunk.

Ooh, a free moment of my life that is not being spent sleeping...

If my rehearsal tonight hadn't been canceled, I probably would not have the time to blog right now.

My life is awesome right now. Rehearsals, class, friends, coffee, and Newsies on DVD. What more could a girl want?

Got myself a free wig the other day, when I went to go do reshoots for "Slice of Life." Luckily my haircut was not so drastic as to actually need to use it, but I got to take it home. It's long and black and I call it Megan Fox.

Rehearsals for Poppycock are going quite well. Still at the stage where I don't know my lines yet, which is frustrating because I have a very physical role, and I hate having to have the script in my hands. But I absolutely love going to rehearsal. All the No Tea people are really cool and seem to have their shit together.

Also looming somewhat ominously in the distance is my evening of stand-up comedy. I'm waffling back and forth right now between actually crafting a traditional stand-up routine with written jokes, punchlines, that sort of thing, or maybe doing some kind of comedic performance piece. Seven to Ten minutes is a very long time.

Whatever happens, I hope all my friends come, preferably drunk, and laugh at me. Or with me. Or whatever, as long as there's not total silence or an air of judgement. Or if there is, it had better be a funny air of judgement.

I'm on vocal rest until rehearsal tomorrow, because I lost my voice over the weekend, which I'm sure made the voice-over I recorded yesterday for Poppycock a hell of a lot more interesting. So I have a big night planned. Gonna catch up on the DVR and drink some tea. Maybe watch some stand-up, take some notes, steal some jokes.

Is it Tuesday yet? I want to be in rehearsal NOW!

I've just taken stock of what my life is going to be like for the next two months. Rehearsal Monday, Tuesday and Thursday. Improv class Wednesday, and every other day I'm going to need to be at work.

I have to give my manager my new availability today and get a new work schedule.

I'm not going to have any free time. The only night I'm going to have off is going to be Wednesday since class ends at six, but since I'm required to see improv shows at UCB in order to advance to the next level, I'm sure that's what I'll be doing on those nights.

Oh for the days when I will be getting paid to do theatre, and don't have to keep a survival job. Oh for the days.



Is it Tuesday yet?